112 Comments
Oct 19, 2023·edited Oct 19, 2023Pinned

Thank you. But I have to agree with someone else who wrote a comment. Aren't we supposed to want to give ourselves a chance of less internal chaos in our live's, by working on living our lives without alcohol and that involves moving on from the 'falling apart' stuff', surely ? ..I'm so vulnerable right now that I was a bit confused by the message. But I do understand that I need to embrace the strange. I still like myself ...I'm muddling through. And I'm guilty of letting people know that I'm work in progress' ...fk that..I'm just a human being

Lucie.xxx

I think this stuff is for people who are out the other side of addiction maybe, and onto other things. In 'Quit Like a Woman'...you fell to your knees and prayed for help because things fell apart 'big time' and you then moved slowly through your healing recovery.

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I love this and really needed to hear it today. My kitchen cabinet doors are partially painted in the front driveway and I may not actually do the ab workout today or ever fully process the traumatic experience of my daughters birth that happened 8 years ago. And its fucking fine. Thanks for sharing Holly.

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Was just thinking of you today 💫 always good to see your name pop up in the inbox. Bookmarked to read later. Much love ❤️

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This made me think about the concept of self-actualisation as introduced by Goldstein, made into a pyramid by Maslow, and a foundation of Rogers approach to psychotherapy.

Mostly people seem to focus on the the implicit need to constantly move forwards, ie to self-actualise, whereas I try to think about it as a race that will never be run because there is always further to go, so why knock yourself out trying?

I’m off to have a long bath and then stroke the dog.

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Loved this one, Holly. Thank you. Also, on being close, I like this take:

“Human beings do not find their essence through fulfillment or eventual arrival but by staying close to the way they like to travel, to the way they hold the conversation between the ground on which they stand and the horizon to which they go.”

~ David Whyte: https://www.kolhai.org/close_david_whyte

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Also, the Discover weekly playlist often feels like a fuck up because the algorithm isn’t broadening my horizons by offering me Noah Gundersen simply because I liked him last week. I can already find the stuff I already like.

I long for the days I used to browse the record shops buying albums purely because I liked the look of the cover.

That was worthwhile self-actualisation.

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I feel this so incredibly deeply.

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founding
Oct 18, 2023Liked by Holly Whitaker

Every time you post a newsletter I wind up buying a new book 😊

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Oct 18, 2023Liked by Holly Whitaker

Everyone I talk to is lonely. (Granted the list of people I talk to is very short but still)

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Been listening to the philosophize this episodes about Byung-Chul Han!!!

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Oct 18, 2023Liked by Holly Whitaker

I’m going to need to read this a few thousand more times. 😘

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Andrea Gibson is a national treasure. Their poetry is breathtaking.

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Thank you, as always. So very thoughtful.

I'm hoping you can correct the link to the book recommendations from Slow Factory (it currently links to only "Fateful Triangle."

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Thank you Holly for letting us into your always honest, compassionate, bracing thoughts on the moment we find ourselves in and--and on the moment YOU find yourself in--because we are all in some kind of moment, transition, it seems, trying to make sense of us and the world. I related to so much of what you said and at the end of it, I think what was at the tip of your tongue landed for me: "Being what we actually are instead of believing the only life worth living is the one that never actually comes, but that we’re working towards diligently." I am as diligent as a worker ant on the endless trail of the best-is-yet-to-come. Perhaps it's time to look at where that's gotten me.

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Oct 19, 2023Liked by Holly Whitaker

My friend and I wonder if we are in purgatory?

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I'd forest bathe with you any day of the week. xo.

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