“I got it, I lost it”: A thread

Retry: I posted it and substack lost it

Resending because right as I published this, Substack crashed (anyone else feel like they’re having a personal mercury retrograde this week?!).

Thanks for your patience and sorry to the folks who posted a comment.

This is a thread about the feeling of having “had” something and lost it. It could be a sense of feeling close to God/awakening or clarity; having “thrived” in recovery or abstinence and then “lost it” (returned to use or even just lost that initial pink cloud feeling); having done something again you thought you’d never do again; anything where you feel like you finally nailed it and then all the sudden there you are, back in it.

You can talk about your own experience of it, if you’re in it what it’s like, if you’re on the other side of it what things helped you navigate it.

I’m interested in this topic for a few reasons. One, because of my own experience the last few years which has felt underworld, especially after having achieved certain statuses and accomplished certain …