I just read your email requesting using the comments section so here I am! I started writing a blog recently. These two particular posts linked below talk specifically about my sobriety, I also included the landing page below specific links. I am sharing my story for the very reason you just described. How a lot of us are feeling the same feels. My thoughts are that just maybe one person will read my story and know they aren’t alone. Holly your story made me feel connected and seen. Love to you all. I see you.
Thank you so much Holly! You have inspired me to bare my soul without concern for the criticism others because of the raw vulnerability in which you share. You have a way of baring your soul that makes others feel seen. We all just want to feel like we belong somewhere. You give us a place to belong. Thank you.
Goodness, I love these Roundups. Just juicy, lush piles of interesting/informative/inspiring reading that get my brain going on soooo much. Thank you for compiling them, it feels like a labor of love, in how much I get out of them! {{big smooch}}
Thank you, Holly, for the reminder to comment and connect with others in this community. My recovery journey has been the most successful when I allow myself to be vulnerable enough to share with someone else. Loving the newsletter! So grateful to be here.
It's excruciating to be seen and to be vulnerable, at least for me. Which is in some sense why I keep doing it, to just be tender and not so armored. Thanks for this comment. Grateful you're here.
Just a quick note to any other Portlanders curious about the zero proof bar - I went to Sucker Punch’s preview over the weekend, and loved it. If you miss high end cocktails and high end cocktail place vibes, good news: there’s now a place where you can get a fancy drink and contemplate the complex interplay of flavors and watch bartenders do their thing and the whole menu is FOR YOU and there’s zero uneasiness about anyone else’s observed relationship with alcohol. Also if you have a wishlist of NA products you want to try, between Sucker Punch’s little shopping area and the Market of Choice in the same block, you can probably save yourself some shipping $$$.
Ohhh Holly! You mean I can comment with out DMing you on Instagram. Can’t wait to read all these comments!! I love love seeing all of this already and look forward to reading Phaedra’s story and hello everyone💕. I have been experiencing a lot of anger lately when that is not my go to. Maybe it’s a secondary emotion behind sadness.? Or maybe I just did not get angry enough before medicated and numb as well as drunk? It’s so crazy making this new person we give birth to a newer more tidy version but the new emotions are exactly that and so unfamiliar I’m trying not to feel shame and just see it as almost like a Drs diagnosis. Love and hugs xo Libby
I actually turned off DMs yesterday (I had literally no idea you could do that.) So YES! I have no idea about YOUR anger but mine I've been thinking about lately and I *think* I'm going to try and write about?? Who knows. Love you.
Another great book on grief that a therapist recommended is The Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller
Just finished a beautifully written addiction/mental health memoir - The Weight of Air by David Poses; David tells the story about his heroin/opioid addiction, how a traditional 12 step model didn't work for him, and how he finally found a way to recovery that worked for him. I came to know his writing through his vocal harm reduction advocacy on Twitter. Sadly, David died last week; I'm recommending this book because it is a good read but also because he leaves behind a wife and two kids so any proceeds from this book would be of great help to his family.
And PS... am I the only one who thinks if the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism is going to advise against using the terms "Alcohol Abuse" and "Alcoholism" (which I agree with), then maybe they should... think about changing their name?
Alex I know about David, I bought his book when it came out and because I was reading like three addiction memoirs I set it aside (heavy stuff always). Then I heard from Carl Fisher he died (I think I only found his book through some review some where). I started reading it this past week, I'm almost done. I'm including it in my Feb book reviews. It is extremely hard to read especially given his last few tweets. It also makes me care a lot more about this work; I'm considering going back to grad school to get a degree, and this would be why. Also, lols, NIAAA.
Truly heartbreaking. I’m gutted about his passing for so many reasons but after finishing his book I was so sad for the books and articles that won’t be written now. He was so gifted.
Hey Hol, i just love quitted esp. this last episode where you shared. When I went from Corporate to Syd ( my company The Suburban Monk) it was literally the hardest 2 years of my life. And mind you at the age of 25 within 10 months both my parents, grandfather and cousin died so that says a lot!
I had the picture perfect life but spending 30 years rising to the top in corporate land and then quitting and everyone thought I was crazy and I would hang on the couch for endless hours until a human walked in and I would get dressed quickly and act like everything was fine .
I look back and see while omg so unbearable those were actually the most important years of my life.
Sure I got to create something I love , Syd etc. but I was learning how to find true sustainable joy , the kind of joy that sometimes might not feel like joy but I know I am living an authentic life.
This is all to say thank you for sharing this topic, your honesty etc.. and if I remember correctly from Hip Sobriety- You are exactly where you are suppose to be. ( ok you can slap me 🤷♀️) Oh and “This place where you are right now, God circled on a map for you” Hafiz. Got those from hip sobriety years also .
HEY. Ooof I love this so much. The whole sitting on the couch and then pretending like "nothing to see here we're fine all is good." This is so normalizing Ellen. I love you so much. Maybe now we take that Shakti dance class together. And I also happily take my own advice served back <3
Holly, I’ve listened to your interview on Quitted and thought about it quite a bit. It is so helpful to hear you and Emily discussing how walking away from your businesses felt in your bodies and minds. But I am left wondering how to feel about Tempest. I don’t want to support something that hurt someone I care about. Perhaps you will talk or write about that at some point.
Very important question and a huge part of why I have absolutely not wanted to mention anything at all. First: I am grateful for it even if it crushed me at the time; not a victim, but a person who probably needed to move forward with her life in a different direction who wouldn’t have otherwise. Second, the coaches, creators and team didn’t do anything to me, no one for that matter did. If anything hurt, it’s the system we’re part of and that mostly was the point I was trying to relay. That detail was important for me to voice.
Thank you, Holly. You didn’t say anything negative, but I was left with an uneasy feeling - my own distrust. I appreciate you clarifying. I appreciate you for everything. ❤️
Thank you for sharing your gift, deep wisdom and the emotional realities of quitting a part of your life in a relatable way. First, your book has been a lifeline, a friend I would just sit with and feel like I had a conversation with, and now, this newsletter and your podcast! It all fits into place for me - former workaholic (auditor!! F-ing billable hours!) suddenly turned stay at home mom - and I couldn’t explain the grief or ambivalence about my decision without the guilt and shame that I couldn’t make it doable with little kids… and while I did make it work by polluting my otherwise pure body with alcohol, I could not sustain feeling like a failure at both motherhood and my job. (I had to quit - the job and still working on the recovery piece, kids are fine) Thank you to you and Emily for sharing your stories - so so much I recognized. You two have brought forth the missing piece that no one talks about, but we all face at one point or another - to quit - be it a job, bad lifestyle habits, or relationships. These are the mysterious and painful places we all will find ourselves - thank you for guiding us through it with your voice and your beautiful words. Happy to be here.
I just read your email requesting using the comments section so here I am! I started writing a blog recently. These two particular posts linked below talk specifically about my sobriety, I also included the landing page below specific links. I am sharing my story for the very reason you just described. How a lot of us are feeling the same feels. My thoughts are that just maybe one person will read my story and know they aren’t alone. Holly your story made me feel connected and seen. Love to you all. I see you.
https://fivefootview.com/2022/02/12/lost/
https://fivefootview.com/2022/02/21/treasured/
https://fivefootview.com/
Phaedra thank you for commenting! And sharing your work!!! I’m excited to check it out and you’re exactly right; stories and “me too!” heals. Love.
btw writing is v. beautiful <3 thanks for sharing it.
Thank you so much Holly! You have inspired me to bare my soul without concern for the criticism others because of the raw vulnerability in which you share. You have a way of baring your soul that makes others feel seen. We all just want to feel like we belong somewhere. You give us a place to belong. Thank you.
Goodness, I love these Roundups. Just juicy, lush piles of interesting/informative/inspiring reading that get my brain going on soooo much. Thank you for compiling them, it feels like a labor of love, in how much I get out of them! {{big smooch}}
I really really love it! It makes a thing I do anyway feel even more fun.
Thank you, Holly, for the reminder to comment and connect with others in this community. My recovery journey has been the most successful when I allow myself to be vulnerable enough to share with someone else. Loving the newsletter! So grateful to be here.
It's excruciating to be seen and to be vulnerable, at least for me. Which is in some sense why I keep doing it, to just be tender and not so armored. Thanks for this comment. Grateful you're here.
Just a quick note to any other Portlanders curious about the zero proof bar - I went to Sucker Punch’s preview over the weekend, and loved it. If you miss high end cocktails and high end cocktail place vibes, good news: there’s now a place where you can get a fancy drink and contemplate the complex interplay of flavors and watch bartenders do their thing and the whole menu is FOR YOU and there’s zero uneasiness about anyone else’s observed relationship with alcohol. Also if you have a wishlist of NA products you want to try, between Sucker Punch’s little shopping area and the Market of Choice in the same block, you can probably save yourself some shipping $$$.
THIS IS THE STUFF!! Yes, Portlanders connect! Thanks Kat.
I am In Portland and plan to check it out thanks for the inside scoop!
Holly, I'm so glad you're back! I love your voice. Love, love, love, love, love...
Sherry: love love love love and more love.
Ohhh Holly! You mean I can comment with out DMing you on Instagram. Can’t wait to read all these comments!! I love love seeing all of this already and look forward to reading Phaedra’s story and hello everyone💕. I have been experiencing a lot of anger lately when that is not my go to. Maybe it’s a secondary emotion behind sadness.? Or maybe I just did not get angry enough before medicated and numb as well as drunk? It’s so crazy making this new person we give birth to a newer more tidy version but the new emotions are exactly that and so unfamiliar I’m trying not to feel shame and just see it as almost like a Drs diagnosis. Love and hugs xo Libby
I actually turned off DMs yesterday (I had literally no idea you could do that.) So YES! I have no idea about YOUR anger but mine I've been thinking about lately and I *think* I'm going to try and write about?? Who knows. Love you.
I can not wait to dig into all this gold. It is like having a care package curated by your wise self. If that makes any sense❤️ I love you Holly!
Aww thank you!!! So so good to see you here. HUGS.
Two book recommendations....
Another great book on grief that a therapist recommended is The Wild Edge of Sorrow by Francis Weller
Just finished a beautifully written addiction/mental health memoir - The Weight of Air by David Poses; David tells the story about his heroin/opioid addiction, how a traditional 12 step model didn't work for him, and how he finally found a way to recovery that worked for him. I came to know his writing through his vocal harm reduction advocacy on Twitter. Sadly, David died last week; I'm recommending this book because it is a good read but also because he leaves behind a wife and two kids so any proceeds from this book would be of great help to his family.
And PS... am I the only one who thinks if the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism is going to advise against using the terms "Alcohol Abuse" and "Alcoholism" (which I agree with), then maybe they should... think about changing their name?
Alex I know about David, I bought his book when it came out and because I was reading like three addiction memoirs I set it aside (heavy stuff always). Then I heard from Carl Fisher he died (I think I only found his book through some review some where). I started reading it this past week, I'm almost done. I'm including it in my Feb book reviews. It is extremely hard to read especially given his last few tweets. It also makes me care a lot more about this work; I'm considering going back to grad school to get a degree, and this would be why. Also, lols, NIAAA.
Truly heartbreaking. I’m gutted about his passing for so many reasons but after finishing his book I was so sad for the books and articles that won’t be written now. He was so gifted.
Come to the harm reduction conference in Puerto Rico! You will love it: https://conference.harmreduction.org/
Hey Hol, i just love quitted esp. this last episode where you shared. When I went from Corporate to Syd ( my company The Suburban Monk) it was literally the hardest 2 years of my life. And mind you at the age of 25 within 10 months both my parents, grandfather and cousin died so that says a lot!
I had the picture perfect life but spending 30 years rising to the top in corporate land and then quitting and everyone thought I was crazy and I would hang on the couch for endless hours until a human walked in and I would get dressed quickly and act like everything was fine .
I look back and see while omg so unbearable those were actually the most important years of my life.
Sure I got to create something I love , Syd etc. but I was learning how to find true sustainable joy , the kind of joy that sometimes might not feel like joy but I know I am living an authentic life.
This is all to say thank you for sharing this topic, your honesty etc.. and if I remember correctly from Hip Sobriety- You are exactly where you are suppose to be. ( ok you can slap me 🤷♀️) Oh and “This place where you are right now, God circled on a map for you” Hafiz. Got those from hip sobriety years also .
Love you through the multiverse and back 💜💜💜
HEY. Ooof I love this so much. The whole sitting on the couch and then pretending like "nothing to see here we're fine all is good." This is so normalizing Ellen. I love you so much. Maybe now we take that Shakti dance class together. And I also happily take my own advice served back <3
Holly, I’ve listened to your interview on Quitted and thought about it quite a bit. It is so helpful to hear you and Emily discussing how walking away from your businesses felt in your bodies and minds. But I am left wondering how to feel about Tempest. I don’t want to support something that hurt someone I care about. Perhaps you will talk or write about that at some point.
Very important question and a huge part of why I have absolutely not wanted to mention anything at all. First: I am grateful for it even if it crushed me at the time; not a victim, but a person who probably needed to move forward with her life in a different direction who wouldn’t have otherwise. Second, the coaches, creators and team didn’t do anything to me, no one for that matter did. If anything hurt, it’s the system we’re part of and that mostly was the point I was trying to relay. That detail was important for me to voice.
Thank you, Holly. You didn’t say anything negative, but I was left with an uneasy feeling - my own distrust. I appreciate you clarifying. I appreciate you for everything. ❤️
I completely get it and I really appreciate the question. And you.
Thank you for sharing your gift, deep wisdom and the emotional realities of quitting a part of your life in a relatable way. First, your book has been a lifeline, a friend I would just sit with and feel like I had a conversation with, and now, this newsletter and your podcast! It all fits into place for me - former workaholic (auditor!! F-ing billable hours!) suddenly turned stay at home mom - and I couldn’t explain the grief or ambivalence about my decision without the guilt and shame that I couldn’t make it doable with little kids… and while I did make it work by polluting my otherwise pure body with alcohol, I could not sustain feeling like a failure at both motherhood and my job. (I had to quit - the job and still working on the recovery piece, kids are fine) Thank you to you and Emily for sharing your stories - so so much I recognized. You two have brought forth the missing piece that no one talks about, but we all face at one point or another - to quit - be it a job, bad lifestyle habits, or relationships. These are the mysterious and painful places we all will find ourselves - thank you for guiding us through it with your voice and your beautiful words. Happy to be here.